Planning ahead for after you’re gone can be uncomfortable but it’s essential if you want to be in control of how your estate is eventually inherited by your loved ones and favourite causes. While a will is the legal way of doing this, a little known extra document could provide further peace of mind that your wishes will be properly followed.
So-called ‘letters of wishes’ make up just 4.1% of estate planning documents, according to 2025 Annual Report from LEAP Estates, a legal software company, (versus 52% for wills). But Tony Cockayne, partner in the disputed wills & estates team at law firm Michelmores, says it is becoming “increasingly common” for individuals to prepare them to accompany their final testaments in the hopes of avoiding disputes over inheritance.
What is a letter of wishes – and how can writing one help you make your voice heard?
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What is a letter of wishes?
Unlike a will, which is a very formally structured and legally binding document, a letter of wishes is more of a nuanced expression of your preferences for your assets and final choices.
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A letter of wishes can add important context to your will, and provide personal guidance to your executors and trustees on how you wish your estate to be administered, but is not legally binding.
“An important difference to a will is that although executors and trustees must take into account the wishes of the testator – the person writing the letter of wishes and will – they are not legally obliged to follow the letter of wishes,” said Cockayne.
Because a letter of wishes is not legally enforceable, it does mean it’s important you appoint executors and trustees who you trust to respect your wishes and to deviate from the guidance only where there is a compelling reason to do so. An example, said Cockayne, would be where there is a significant change in the circumstances of a beneficiary, perhaps because they have got divorced.
What are the advantages of a letter of wishes?
An advantage of a letter of wishes is it can be amended or updated at any time without the same formal execution requirements as a will. For example, unlike a will, a letter of wishes does not need to be witnessed.
The letter is also confidential to the executors and trustees, and its contents should not be disclosed without very good reason. This differs from a will which becomes public once probate has been granted.
“Disclosure of a letter of wishes may be appropriate in circumstances such as where there is a dispute concerning the will or the testator's intentions, as it can help to shed light on the testator's wishes,” said Cockayne.
Letters of wishes are often used alongside a will but they are also useful for accompanying trust deeds. “This is particularly relevant in the context of lifetime discretionary trusts, where trustees have wide discretion in the management of the trust and the distribution of its assets,” Cockayne said.
What can be included in a letter of wishes?
A letter of wishes cannot cover every eventuality, but it can provide key guidance for the executors and trustees to consider. The following is a non-exhaustive list of what someone may want to include in a letter of wishes:
1. Funeral wishes
2. Guidance on personal items and pets
Who should receive certain sentimental or personal items (known as 'personal chattels'), and preferences regarding the care of pets.
3. Guidance relating to the guardians of young children
Such as whether the trustees should consider using the trust fund to support the guardian during their appointment. “This could involve making funds available if the guardian needed to purchase a larger home in which they can all live,” Cockayne said.
4. Explanations of decisions
Why certain individuals have not been left anything or why their share of an estate is kept in trust (rather than being distributed to them outright).
“This may serve as compelling evidence of your intentions and could help in limiting the scope of any potential claim brought against the estate by unhappy beneficiaries,” said Cockayne. It may be worth including this in a separate 'letter of intention', however, so that it cannot be overlooked.
5. Guidance to the trustees of a discretionary trust
When a will creates a discretionary trust, no beneficiary has an automatic right to income or capital. Instead, the trustees have the power to decide who (from the relevant named beneficiaries in the will) should benefit. This flexible arrangement allows trustees to consider the beneficiaries' circumstances. “
You may, therefore, offer detailed guidance in a letter of wishes on matters such as who they would like to benefit, in what proportions and whether it would be preferable to benefit a beneficiary in a way other than by outright distribution,” Cockayne said.
You could also explain your wish for your trustees to take advice so the beneficiaries receive their inheritance while paying as little inheritance tax as possible.
What should be avoided in a letter of wishes?
While a letter of wishes offers flexibility and is tailored to the testator's wishes, you should be mindful of the following, Cockayne said:
1. Avoid overly precise instructions
As a letter of wishes is not legally binding, it should avoid containing any precise or inflexible instructions. Executors and trustees should retain discretion to act in accordance with the testator's overall intentions.
2. Avoid obligations
It is not designed to bind executors and trustees. Any language that implies an obligation may cause confusion or conflict with the will. It is also important to note executors and trustees only have broad discretionary powers in wills which create discretionary trusts. They do not have the same level of discretion (and therefore ability to follow a letter of wishes) where the will provides for outright gifts.
3. Be clear
Although a letter of wishes is relatively informal (particularly in comparison to a will), it should remain clear and straightforward. Ambiguous wishes may hinder the letter's usefulness and lead to misinterpretation.
4. Don't try to predict the future
It should not attempt to anticipate every future scenario. It is common for the circumstances of beneficiaries to change, such as through divorce or bankruptcy, and executors and trustees may need to react accordingly. The letter of wishes should, therefore, focus upon key guidance rather than exhaustive detail.
5. Don't be rude
It is preferable to avoid any potentially sensitive or distressing content as this may lead to unnecessary disputes.
What to do next
Although a letter of wishes does not need to be professionally drafted, it can be beneficial, particularly if you have complex or detailed wishes. “Professional input helps to ensure clarity, avoid pitfalls and align the letter of wishes with the Will or trust deed,” Cockayne said.
Ideally, a letter of wishes should be stored alongside the will or trust deed to ensure it is available when needed. This also minimises the risk of it being misplaced or overlooked.
